Date: October 16, 1995
Place: New Orleans, LA; Tulane University, McAlister Auditorium
Notes: Sheryl Crow's butt
Setlist: Drifter's Escape, Man In The Long Black Coat, All Along The Watchtower, Simple Twist Of Fate, Watching The River Flow, Silvio, Mr. Tambourine Man, Masters Of War, It's All Over Now, Baby Blue, Maggie's Farm, Lenny Bruce, Obviously Five Believers, Alabama Getaway, The Times They Are A-Changin', Rainy Day Women # 12 & 35

Last time we talked about Chris Cornell and Soundgarden. This week we're going to change things up a little. I'm a BIG fan of music from the 60's and the 70's (even though I was only born in '76), and I've working for a new radio station at the "drive time" guy in the afternoons. The reason I'm not on the morning show is because I have decided to start attending Nicholls State University in Thibodaux, LA. At Nicholls, I'm majoring in what else but Mass Communications. I've also become a member of the Student Programming Association at the school. I've also been trying to become the big man on campus, so I went and joined a fraternity as well. Tau Kappa Epsilon, my frat, is the largest one on campus at the time, so when the SPA decided to throw a party or concert, they came to us to provide the security. It was the fall semester and I was in an SPA meeting when we decided to book Bob Dylan as our fall concert. Of course, I was going to try to stick my two cents in and get on the security staff, so I got a bunch of my frat brothers together and we provided all the security that we could muster in our drunken stupors.

Bob Dylan is one of the greatest artists that ever lived and I REALLY wanted to meet this guy. To be in his presence would have been the greatest thing that I could ever imagine. So instead of showing up at the time I was supposed to be at the auditorium, I decided I was going to go as early as possible to meet the man. It was a Sunday concert and I didn't have to work, so I went to the auditorium around 1 in the afternoon to see if I could wiggle some time out of old Bob. Much to my disappointment, I couldn't get near the guy. He had this 6'8" bodyguard that wouldn't let anyone even remotely close to him. So I fucked around and started talking to some of the crew. I became really good friends with the guitar tech on the tour, J.R., and we bullshitted around for most of the afternoon. The show went on without a hitch and I never got to even get close to the man except for during the show when I was working the front of the stage. After the show, my frat brothers and I were talking to J.R. and he invited us to go up to the show the next night at Tulane in New Orleans. New Orleans is only about 45 minutes from Thibodaux, so we said what the hell, we'd go. He told us that our names would be on the guest list, and he told me that he'd get me some time with Bob in the afternoon. I was all on this one.

Monday came and I was in class, nervously awaiting my time with Bob. I told the PD at the radio station that I was going to get an interview with Bob Dylan and he was all for it, too, and let me off for that day. I got to Tulane around 4 o'clock that afternoon and, to my amazement, just walked right through the doors into the auditorium like I owned the place. I saw J.R. napping in the chairs near the front of the stage, so I decided to be a dick and go fuck with him. I finally woke him up and we sat there talking about New Orleans for a little while and then the time came that I'd been waiting for all day. Bob normally sits in his dressing room before the show and "warms up" by playing a little guitar. I'm a guitar player, and J.R. is a guitar player, so I brought up the idea of a little jam session. We grabbed a couple of acoustics off the guitar rack and walked into his dressing room. There was Bob, sitting in a chair that had the really cool purple throw covering it and was surrounded by a Peruvian sauna. Now I understood what J.R. meant by "warming up." I was introduced to the man himself and he offered me a seat and passed the pipe over my way. We sat there and smoked and talked for about 30 minutes when he picked up his guitar and started to play "Watchtower." I picked up mine and went straight into the solo for it and I guess you could say that he was impressed because he stopped playing and just stared at me and J.R. jamming out. Finally we were all laughing and he was showing me how to play a few songs when they were going to go eat before the concert. I wasn't that hungry, so I stayed behind and talked to a bunch of the crew.

Bob and the rest of the band got back about an hour before the show, and he introduced me to the rest of the band. Those were some of the coolest guys I've ever met in my whole life. The rest of my frat brothers had finally showed up and we were all hanging out backstage when the four of us went outside for a smoke. We were standing outside the backstage door and I was telling them about getting all stoned and jamming with Bob when someone walked up behind me and asked me for a cigarette. I knew it was female, but the voice never hit me. I reached into my coat pocket and pulled out the pack and just handed over my shoulder to her so she could get one. Almost immediately she asked if she could have a light too. I pulled out my Zippo and as I was turning to light it, I asked her if she needed a kick in the ass for a jump-start too. My brothers were all laughing at the comment when I went to light her cig. It was dark out there and I really couldn't make her out, but as soon as the light from the flame hit her face I felt like the biggest ass in the world. I had just asked Sheryl Crow if I could kick her in the ass. I was dumbfounded. She just looked at me, shook my hand and introduced herself to the guys and me. We got to talking and she told us that her and Bob were old friends and since she was in New Orleans doing some work with Trent Reznor, she thought it she would stop by and sit in with Bob for a few songs. I told her that after the show, we were all going to go out to Bourbon Street with some of the crew and asked if she wanted to come along. She said sure, and the only thing that was running through my mind at that time was that I was going to be going out with Sheryl Crow!!! We went back in and watched the show from backstage. Sheryl stood next to me for most of it and we were talking about music and pretty much any thing else I could think of just to keep her close to me.

The show had been going on for almost an hour when Bob called Sheryl out to the stage so she could play some accordion with him on a couple songs. That was some of the coolest stuff I had ever seen, yet I was having trouble keeping my eyes off of her perfectly shaped ass. They played a couple of songs together, and then did the encore; finishing the show like Bob always does with Rainy Day Women. After J.R. and them got done with what they had to do, he came find us outside talking to Bob and Sheryl. We were trying to get Bob to come out with us, but he declined. We all jumped into Sheryl's limo and took off to Bourbon Street. On the ride, Sheryl had mentioned that she had never had a real Pat O'Brien's Hurricane before and I offered to get her one. The limo parked a couple of blocks from Bourbon, and we hoofed it over to Pat O's. The first thing I always do at Pat O'Brien's is find the photographer to document my visit, and this time was going to be no different. We all got our hurricanes and took a picture in front of the big fountain with Sheryl sitting on my lap and kissing me on the cheek. I guess that was her idea of a joke. The night went on and we had an awesome time with Sheryl and J.R., right up to the time that we left. On the ride back to the auditorium to get our cars, Sheryl was sitting next to me and kept her hand on my thigh. I returned the favor and had some VERY nasty thoughts running through my mind. We got back after about a 15 minute ride, and Sheryl got out to tell us all bye and how much fun she had. After 3 hurricanes, you are bound to have a good time. She gave all my frat bros hugs and told J.R. that she'd bring him to the hotel, and came up to me and kissed me smack dab on the mouth. I told her that she could bring me back to her hotel and we all had a great big laugh. She took a dollar bill from her pocket, tore it in half, and told me that if those two parts ever met up again, she'd marry me. We all had a good laugh and I gave her my number, hoping that she'd call, and took off back to Houma. The next day I was the most popular guy around campus, because my brothers told everyone they knew that I was kissed by Sheryl Crow, and the next thing you know, by noon or so people were coming up to me asking me about "having sex" with her. Things have a tendency to get stretched out around that place. When I told my programming director the story, he loved it and I had more than enough material for that afternoon's show. To this day, the picture that we took at Pat O'Brien's hangs at a local nightclub here in Houma as a part of my memorabilia collection that I have on loan to them.

Hang around for the next article when I get drunk with The Reverend Horton Heat and Jimbo, and sing at the after party with Kim Lenz and Her Jaguars. Not to mention how I go to the after party in the first place.

Until then, be good. And if you can't be good, BE GOOD AT IT!

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