For those who don't know, the Coney Island Mermaid Parade is, for New York's freaks and weirdos, the official start of summer. The Saturday after the Solstice, the city's most creative and most demented come together to create floats and marching groups in a sort of Mardi Gras-cum-beach party celebration of weirdness. Each year a celebrity King Neptune and the Mermaid Queen get the dubious honor of judging the low- and no-budget entries; this year's King and Queen were Moby (who, true to form, looked rather bored with his officiating duties) and Theo formerly of the Lunachicks. A career-resurrecting gig, this isn't.

Much like New York's Finest, the cream of New York's Weirdest—Reverend Jen, Editrix Abby, and Blackwolf the Wizard—were also out in full force. Though we were busy marching with Billionaires for Bush, we still managed to get some snapshots of the festivities.

Cororate Mofo's own Mistress Rowena as a Billionaire pirate wench
Ow! Ow! I'm sorry I called you a wench!

Ken Mondschein, Corporate Mofo himself, wearing some kind of ass-pirate-Scotsman-billionaire outfit. We couldn't print the upkilt shot in a family Web 'zine.

Pray we never have children

An impromptu Billionaire sword fight

Melody of Billionaires for Bush. Arr! I'm a Pirate of the Caribbean Offshore Bank!

Local celebrity Reverend Jen and Jen Junior and a Coke cup full of Budweiser

Editrix Abby, showing off her pearl necklace

The day wouldn't have been complete without a sighting of New York's City's official lunatic mage, Blackwolf the Wizard!

At a lesbian wedding, even the cake smells like fish

Much like Lent, the Mermaid Parade is where all sins are forgiven. Including using the President's portrait on pasties. Jeez, those are sagging worse than the economy!

Watch out, Moby! The fat man wants to eat you!

Ah, yes. The reason why you clicked on this page: Pictures of cute girls. Bet you want to swab her decks.

Remember: Where there are weird alien chicks in body paint, William Shatner is sure to follow.

"Mommy, giving me the Mohawk was bad enough! Please don't make me look at the saggy mermaid boobies!"

"Son, listen to your mother! You'll look at mermaid boobies and like it!"

Anyone want to play beach blanket bingo? Write to editor@corporatemofo.com!